Insomnia

For the last two weeks, I haven't been able to sleep.  Granted, some shit has been on my mind.  But after my appointment on Thursday with my shrink, I thought, "Fuck, can I finally get some fucking sleep and not wake up at 3:45am again?!" Low and behold, I slept like a baby that night and hoped for more nights like this to come.  Fast forward to Friday...

Every Friday, we get free pizza at our office.  And like every hungry and free loading son of a bitch, I take prime advantage of this opportunity.  Hungry or not.  I decided to have about 5 slices and add as much pepper flakes as humanly possible.  Bad fucking idea. You're probably all asking yourself, "What the hell does this have to do with insomnia?"  I'm getting to that part so bare with me.  One thing you should know about me is that I love hot shit.  Even though pepper flakes aren't hot, it adds spice (ummm, maybe more flavor.  shit, i don't even think flavor is the right choice of word.) and well, anything to alter the taste of something is never a bad thing. 

I hit the pillow around 9:30-10pm last night then around 3:45am this morning, my stomach starting turning.  And when my stomach turns the way it did, one thing is certain - I'm gonna shit my brains out.  That my friends, is what I did.

Have you ever sat on the throne with you hands over your face and asked God, "Why?  Why me?!" as you hold onto the walls hoping you don't go into a seizure?  Well, that's what I've been doing for the last 2-3 hours as I feel the after effects of those fucking little pepper flakes.  While I sat there grimacing and contemplating life, feeling absolutely miserable, I'm pissed that I've had one good nights rest in 2 weeks and the one night that I don't sleep, is because I had too many fucking pepper flakes on 5 slices of pizza which really wasn't that good to begin with. Really, J-Wunder?!  Today is going to be brutal because 1) I'm dead tired, 2) Flames are shooting out of my ass like a goddamn flame thrower.  Looks like I'm gonna need some baby wipes soon.

You're welcome.