Wednesday, June 22, 2016

21 Things You Probably Shouldn’t Buy At The Dollar Store

1. A kitchen thing:

A kitchen thing:
This would be funny to buy so you could pull it out whenever someone in your kitchen asks, “Can you hand me the thing?”

2. This almost, not quite inspirational pocket notebook:

This almost, not quite inspirational pocket notebook:
It will inspire you…to make grammatical errors.

3. Smoked oysters:

Smoked oysters:
You probably don’t want to eat smoked oysters from anywhere, actually.

4. Ribeye steak:

Ribeye steak:
Eating this will be a mis-steak.

5. This very confused sweatshirt:

This very confused sweatshirt:
It’s actually a pretty good deal if you plan to wear it ironically.

6. Vacuum-sealed corn on the cob:

Vacuum-sealed corn on the cob:
The package says it’s ready to eat, but are you ready to eat it?

7. Bananas:

Bananas:
This is a pretty bad purchase if you have your heart set on bananas. On the other hand, if you like avocados…

8. A misspelled “baby shower” banner:

A misspelled "baby shower" banner:
“Donna, that was the best baby shober ever!”

9. A knockoff Disney princess lollipop:

A knockoff Disney princess lollipop:
It not only tastes bad, but will also haunt your dreams after you finish it (probably).

10. Bacon bowls:

Bacon bowls:
Granted, this sounds like the greatest invention in the history of humankind, but since it’s sold only at the Dollar Store I’m thinking nah.

11. Stone pendant:

Stone pendant:
Actually, you might be able to totally rock this.

12. Larry the Cable Guy’s Biscuits & Sausage Gravy:

Larry the Cable Guy's Biscuits & Sausage Gravy:
Git-r-done…in the bathroom after you try to eat this.

13. A movie starring Paris Hilton:

A movie starring Paris Hilton:
It’s called The Hottie & The Nottie. You, of course, will nottie be watching.

14. A biography of Simon Cowell:

A biography of Simon Cowell:
Unfortunately, this biography doesn’t discuss his time at American Idol.

15. Or even worse — a biography of Sanjaya:

Or even worse — a biography of Sanjaya:
Unfortunately, this biography doesn’t discuss his time at American Idol.

16. This atrocity:

This atrocity:
Wildly inappropriate + wildly out of date.

17. A “yeti” pot:

A "yeti" pot:
They only changed one letter, but somehow made it sound so much more disturbing.

18. A “samurai” costume:

A "samurai" costume:
The child looks less than thrilled — probably because it’s actually a knight’s costume.

19. Olive loaf:

Olive loaf:
Somewhere someone’s 94-year-old great aunt is serving them this right now.

20. Wrapping paper that might kill you:

Wrapping paper that might kill you:
Yeah, it causes cancer, but what do you want for 99 cents?

21. Warming jelly:

Warming jelly:
There will be burning.
via - BuzzFeed