Today Can Go F*ck Itself!!!!

Fuck today goddamnit.

Fuck this morning and the bullshit I had to deal with when I got to work.

Fuck the fact that I need to take a fat shit and haven't yet.  Its been fucking hours and I feel like my fucking intestines are gonna fucking explode.  Fuck. 

Fuck that I can't even think, let alone drink a glass of water in fucking peace.

Fuck today, fuck this weather, fuck the fucking meetings, fuck the asshole who jumped in front of a car making me 10 minutes late for work.

Fuck my 12 o'clock meeting so now I can fucking eat lunch.

Fuck this goddamn phone and the shitty battery life it has.

Fuck the fact that i want a drink and can't have a drink.

Fuck you lady in the umbrella that is trying to take up the whole goddamn sidewalk.  Bitch.

Fuck you people in a good mood today.  I hope you get hit by a fucking bus.

Fuck the fact that I paid for lunch and see that there is free lunch when I get back from the fucking lunch I fucking paid for.  Fuck.

Fuck you Oscar Meyer Weiner.

Fuck you people that all you do is bitch about shit no one cares about.  Do me a favor, go fuck yourself.

Fuck that goddamn steel drum player that always plays the same fucking song outside my office. 

Fuck the fucking bitch who didn't take her dog outside when she went to a meeting, and now I get to listen to the fucking dog bark all fucking afternoon.

Fuck the fucking douche who over-microwaved his salmon for lunch, making the entire floor smell like fucking pussy.

Fuck the fucking asshole who took a shit in the bathroom and left fucking streaks along the bottom of the fucking toilet.  Sick fuck. 

Fuck this same asshole who forgot to spray too.  

Fuck this fucking headache I've had since 6am this morning.

Fuck 5 hours of sleep.  

Fuck, I need a goddamn fucking haircut.  I look like a fucking Chia Pet for fuck's sake.  

Fuck I'm so fucking tired.  

Fuck that.  Fuck it.  Today can go fuck itself.