Thursday, December 16, 2010

Four Loko User of the Day


Ian Cross: I got drunk on beer and whiskey. When we went on a booze run we decided we need energy. We decided on Four Loko. One of those bad boys sent me into a downward spiral. First, I fought a door. Then I got into an arguement with my roomate about nothing. I gathered up all of my hygiene gear, a Hajii rag, an 8 intch knife, and a bottle of mustard. After throwing all of my hygiene gear into the river, I wrapped the Hajii rag around my head like a terrorist. I found a tree that i didnt like, sprayed it with mustard, and proceeded to knife fight it for about 10 minutes. I disapeared. I found out later that multiple cop cars were on the look out for me for about an hour. I forgot why i was mad at my roomate and started back. thats when I was arrested. Damn fuzz finally got me. My roomate magically showed up and started yelling things like,"TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF!! IT LOOKS BETTER ON COPS!!" I didn't have the knife on me anymore so they had to let me go. Colonel Mustard, in the quad, with the knife. Game over.

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